AN EXCERPT OF "THE JOURNEY TO SPIRIT"

THE JOURNEY TO SPIRIT

A GUIDE TO

PSYCHIC DEVELOPMENT 

AND

SPIRITUAL AND INSPIRATIONAL PHILOSOPHY

Copyright © 2012 Astrid Brown

All rights reserved.

ISBN-10:1470197693 

ISBN-13:978-1470197698 

No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the author. The only exception is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a review.

Astrid Brown

FOREWORD 

I decided to write this book as everyone has a psychic ability. We are all born with it but so seldom do we use it to its best ability. It originated as part of our survival mechanism to help keep us safe and out of danger, but through the centuries that have gone by most of us have allowed this great resource to lie latent. Animals still use theirs to their best ability, they've had no one to tell them not to use it. It's not fearful, nor creepy but another sense bestowed upon us we've allowed to lie dormant. I also want to dispel the myths and misconceptions about Psychics and Mediums.

Basically when I link with spirit, it's just like having a three way chat, only difference is that, the client, can't see or hear who I am speaking to, this does not mean I will make up a reading, far from it I will first of all obtain 'survival evidence' i.e. proof this person did exist on earth and I look for names, dates, the cause of death and their character and relation to you. I will also look for pieces of unique information only known to the client as evidence their spirit was around i.e giving me details of what the client has been doing recently etc.

Normally I begin looking for a way to connect with the client, I can use a mantic tool, such as cards, crystals or a palm, for without that connection I cannot proceed. Every reading should be viewed as an experiment, sometimes it doesn't work, sometimes this is the client who is inadvertedly blocking the psychic, all that might be needed is to unfold the arms or uncross the legs sometimes the client is unconsciously closing down their mind. Psychics do need the client's permission to read for them.

Nor are we mind readers. I often get calls asking me, "Can you tell me what my boyfriend/girlfriend or whoever is thinking about me?" The short answer is NO I can't, nor can any psychic medium tell you this. Everybody's thoughts are private, so there is no point in asking, and any psychic medium who tells you they can read minds I'm afraid is making this up. However what we can do is this: we can connect to the boy friend's etc spirit guide and they can tell us how they are feeling and of course the spirit guide will only tell us what they have permission to tell us. Mind reading is a misconception and myth I'm afraid.

Another fallacy is NO ONE can predict the future accurately, in spite of what you have been led to believe. Psychic medium's are not fortune tellers anybody who thinks or says this is misinformed. It may surprise you to know this but you already know your future, no one else does, for YOU and all of us for that matter, alone planned it, you planned what experiences and challenges YOU wished to go through before you incarnated on earth. However what psychic medium's can do is this: we can tap into your auric field for the vibrations of your past, present and future are there but its down to how good a connection we have. The other fly in the ointment to this process is what's known as 'FREE WILL' Free will is whether we wish to go through with what we alone have planned and of course since everyone has Free will can you now see how practically impossible it is to predict the future accurately? However what I can do is link with Spirit, whether it is loved ones that have passed over or a Spirit Guide and they can more accurately give me some more information as to likely outcomes. They WILL NOT tell me what is coming if there is a spiritual challenge coming up as this is a teaching experience and something that should not be avoided, and if I was party to this information you might try and avoid it.

The Universe works on a whole set of Universal laws that influence outcomes too and more on Universal laws can be found later in this book

Neither I nor any other psychic medium want a client to go away feeling disappointed but you need to allow us to form a link with you either within your aura or with your spirit guides to gleam information. The vast majority of us work to extremely high ethical standards and we can only tell you, the client what information we receive, nor can we influence Tom, Dick or Harry to be attracted to you or make them like you, we cannot make things up to let you hear what you want to hear. Sometimes you will get information you won't like, this is not the psychic medium's fault, we are only the messenger. However what we can do is this: we can let you know you are loved and supported and guided by spirit, that you are never alone in your darkest hour and are given strength to cope with whatever the Universe throws at us all. Not only that WE CAN PROVE THIS, by giving you survival evidence and by giving us a little time to connect we can hopefully uplift you and that you go away feeling better to having talked with us.

I hope this book not only helps you on your spiritual journey but takes the fear and mystery of how all of this works, To enable you to understand how we progress and how all experiences in life the good and the bad enable us to learn and grow. To me I find if you explain how the Universe and Spirit works it helps the developing students understand why its necessary to practice meditation etc. It also enables the student to understand divine timing and why patience is necessary.

Some of you will read this book who wish to develop into Mediums and as you read through these pages you will know if this applies to you. Others will be content working on a psychic level and some of you will just want information and insight into the world of psychics and mediums and to how we work

Above all I hope this book addresses these doubts and encourages others to use such a marvelous gift.

* * * * * * 

PSYCHIC PROTECTION 

There is often a problem at night for those who are beginning their psychic development journey. You see when you initially open up to the world of the Spirit realms, there are those spirits, who basically think they can have some fun. These spirits inhabit the Astral plane, this is the lowest of the several spiritual realms and its is on this realm that inhabit earth bound spirits, i.e. those who feel they are trapped in a period of limbo, it could possibly be something traumatic that is holding them there, but often or not it is spirit who are denying the light and unwilling to accept good or it is the mischievous 'Lower Elementals' nature spirits. Lower Elementals are purely Earth Spirits i.e nymphs, fairies, elves etc who like nothing better but to have some wicked fun. Sometimes and again following the laws of the Universe there are lower entities from the dark side. These often take the form of flying creatures and what I can best describe as resembling gargoyles, these entities feed on negativity, so the best way to avoid them is by keeping a positive mind set. 

What is important to remember, NOTHING CAN HARM YOU. OK they may give you a good fright but that is all they can do, no spirit, good, bad or indifferent can possess you in anyway, contrary to what folklore would have you believe. 

The Universe does operate on a series of laws i.e. 'The law of attraction' where like attracts like and it is this law that is in operation that can cause a few problems. You have to remember we as humans are 'Spirit' in a physical body whilst we are on Earth and we all develop spiritually at different rates. The whole concept of being on Earth is to help us develop spiritually, with each incarnation we grow more spiritually and the older the soul the more experienced and spiritual we become. 

To explain we understand more about compassion, empathy and understanding and we become more positive and pure of heart. However for those beginning on their Psychic development journey, those experiences are not as strong and they have not developed so spiritually and more prone to negative thinking coupled with the fact their 'mind discipline' is not so astute and controlled as someone who is more experienced psychically. Therein lies the problem which leads me back to the problem lower elementals and earth bound spirits. Now whilst we are awake we are firmly on earth, earth after all is our classroom, whereby we interact with others to enrich our experiences and learn, compassion, empathy etc. but whilst we are asleep, our spirits travel the Astral Planes, in effect we are allowed home at night to interact with the world of spirit, where we may communicate with our loved ones in spirit etc. It is when we are fully relaxed and asleep our protection is at its weakest for the inexperienced developing psychic so they may become the victim of the mischievous lower elementals and earth bound spirits. Now couple this with the 'Law of attraction' and you attract your current type of energy, i.e. if you are a negative thinker, you will attract this type of spirit and likewise if you are a positive thinker you will attract a positive energy form. 

So what can be done to get rid of these nightly problems? We firstly remember NOTHING CAN HARM YOU NOR POSSESS YOU and they will only frighten you if you allow them to do so. Easier said than done but the key here is MIND DISCIPLINE and we do this in development class through visualization and meditation, so we develop a strong mind and will power, this is the basis of Psychic Protection ~ the strength of will. 

You have a choice, we all do for remember no matter for whatever reason we came to earth to experience we also have free will. So we can choose to develop our experiences and many latent Mediums start off in this way, some don't progress this far but do develop their psychic abilities, or we can suppress and ignore these abilities, we all have free will. If you wish to develop your ability, then its best to find a good development group and many of these groups can be found in Spiritualist Churches, many others can be found under the guidance of an experienced Medium. If you do not want to take this ability any further that is fine also, but if you do not want these experiences and disturbances, then you need to refrain from reading and dabbling in psychic subjects and if you do get disturbed you have to show no fear when these experiences happen. If this doesn't work then simple table salt sprinkled in the corners of rooms, should be enough to chase them away. 

Supposing you wish to follow the development path, well remember Universal Laws,there is good and bad, there is a continual balancing of the Universe and Like attracts like, the more spiritual you become the less likely you are to be bothered in this way, if you have good and pure thoughts and don't dwell on the lower side of life, you wont attract this type of energy. At some point all developing Mediums will be shown the dark side, it's a right of passage and I defy any Medium to say they haven't experienced this. In order to understand good, you need to understand the bad, so you can deal with it. How do we deal with the negative and bad we do this through strength of mind for to chase away the bad we need to do so with conviction. We develop strength of mind through the art of Meditation. You will find the better we become in meditating the stronger our minds become, so we are able to turn on and off psychic and mediumistic abilities. We need to be able to do this so we can deal with these entities and communicate more effectively with the world of spirit and also it's very exhausting being tuned in all the time, it uses a great deal of energy up. We also need to learn to protect ourselves from negative energy as this can be terribly exhausting too and you don't need to be a psychic or medium to benefit from this. How many of you have a friend or associate who comes and tells you all their troubles, they make you feel low and tired, of course they go away feeling great, they've off loaded all their negativity onto you. Simple exercises, simply by using visualization can make the world of a difference when dealing with these negative people and protect us when entering negative surroundings. 

One of the easiest exercises is to surround yourself in a sealed golden bubble of light, this is done through visualization and it can be found on my blog here another is asking the Angels to come forward to surround and protect you, but these visualizations have to be focused and concentrated when doing so, practice like most things makes perfect. Really if whatever energy it is all you need do is to say go to the light but you must say it with conviction so it knows you mean it and you don't have to shout it out loud either, simply say it in your mind. If all else fails then their is the salt method and this requires you to put a pinch of salt in every corner of the room and a light sprinkling across the door threshold and window sill, the energy wont cross this as salt is protective. The key to any type or variation of psychic protection is to mean and believe it and those nightly visitations will disappear. 

The whole basis of psychic development is to be able to turn it off and on when YOU WANT IT and not when the spirit realms want it. 

WHY DO WE NEED PSYCHIC PROTECTION? 

Why do we need psychic protection? well overtime we think and create many thoughts, each becomes a thought form, it is in effect an energy. Think about how many thoughts you have in a day, thousands, some of those are positive and that is great, however some of those are negative and all those thoughts we send out into the cosmos. Now these thoughts being energy can become tangible and manifest. It is by the power of thought healers use for distant healing. Remember energy is power and it can be used for good or evil. We may not realize we are doing this but when you think negatively of someone that energy is going somewhere and its generally to the person concerned. These negative thoughts in time can attack and often the symptoms may be headaches, feeling low, lacking energy. 

I'll give you another example how many of you have a friend who comes to visit and likes unburdening their worries and troubles on to you. They feel great for getting all their thoughts of their chest but it often renders you tired and exhausted. This is because they have left all their negative energy on to you. 

So what can we do to prevent this? Well we can use the same process, thought, to protect ourselves from negative energy, psychic attack. 

SIMPLE PROTECTION 

These are some of the simple methods below 

Strengthening the Aura. 

Cleansing with aroma, (any light scent will do that you like) first inhale the scent in cupped hands, then sweep over the body and down to the ground. It is  possible to obtain special preparations for this, but any light scented perfume will do, and even better if you particularly like it! 

Cleansing the Chakra's also helps to protect. Imagine that you are surrounded by a bubble of light, and that nothing can penetrate it unless you wish it to! Extend this to family and especially CAR. In difficult situations, crystallize the outside of the bubble for extra protection! Use crystals for protection (double terminators quartz) 

Protective mirrors in bad attacks. 

If you know what direction the harm is coming from, place a small mirror in your window facing that direction saying:- 

"Mirror bright-mirror clear protect from harm all who bide here" 

Instead of the bubble exercise you may use a hooded, floor length cloak or a shield decorated with a protective design of your choice. The shield idea is versatile as you can use a ‘mini shield’ over any area you feel vulnerable, such as your solar plexus. 

If you shower in the morning visualize the water flowing through your energy field carrying away any negativity down the plughole with it. If you prefer a bath you may add sea or rock salt to the water- about a cupful- dissolve it well. Salt has long been renowned for its cleansing properties. 

Visualize a shower of light running through your aura and dissolving any negativity. 

Stay grounded. Visualize roots growing deep down into the Earth from the soles of your feet. Being ‘well grounded’ offers a great deal of protection. Practice your grounding visualization every morning and whenever you feel ‘spacey’. Carry hematite or another grounding stone with you if necessary. 

PROTECTIVE CRYSTALS 

Protective crystals vary and can be black agate, amethysts, bloodstones, carnelians, garnets, black and red jasper, lapis lazuli, rose and smokey quartz, tigers eye, topaz and turquoise. 

Carry one or more in a dark silk purse about your person when entering a potential hostile situation. 

You can also use protective crystals on a desk or table between you and potential sources of hostility and negativity to protect you from someone dumping all their negativity/woes on to you and draining your energy. I regularly do this when meeting potential clients. 

Keep a large chunk of rose quartz or amethyst beside your bed whilst you sleep 

Frequently wash the crystals in running water to cleanse them visualizing you are rinsing them in a waterfall and that negativity is transformed into positive energy. if you have been in a very negative situation after cleansing them in running water, sprinkle with salt and pass them over an incense stick or oil burner evaporating lavender, pine or rose oil. Wrap the crystals in a dark cloth and allow to rest for a few days before using again 

* * * * * * 

HOLDING ON TO GRUDGES 

Is there any point in holding on to grudges, sulking and not talking to anyone? You may not have any control of how others treat you but you can set and live by example. How is there any hope of solution or compromise, if one or neither party is talking to the other? This goes for all arguments and this goes for wars too, someone has to make a move and this should be you. You will never make a "right" from two "wrongs", be the bigger person and make a special effort to hold out an Olive branch and I will tell you why. 

Holding on to grudges, resentment like other negative emotions only damages your own soul in the long run, it will affect your health and well being for when you dwell in negativity this causes changes in your auric field causing it to shrink in on itself, this in turn then affects the functioning of the Chakras (energy vortices within the body and responsible for conducting the body's life force through the body and maintaining homeostasis). Each Chakra governs a major endocrine gland thus affecting hormone balance, hormones are chemical messengers within the body that instigate actions in their target organs e.g. stress hormones such as cortisol instigating a rise in blood pressure, which in turn can damage the kidneys and heart long term. So can you see, how resentment and other negative emotions do us no favors? 

So you hold out the Olive branch the other person has a choice, they can take it or they carry on with their resentment. You may even find they will apologise, this may even get them to talk and both of you together may then see the other's point of view. I would suggest you try this tact a few times appealing to the other party you want to resolve your differences, only by talking will you resolve your differences. 

Supposing they turn away and refuse and want to carry on with their grudge in spite of all your efforts, supposing after you have tried appealing to them a few times even in a letter if they still wont talk and wish to carry on? Well then you walk away, knowing you have done your very best and leave this to Universal law. We live in a Universe where there is a constant balance and exchange of energy. What you give out, you will get back tenfold, this applies to Positive thoughts as well as Negative, if you are constantly giving out positivity to others you have nothing to worry about and all this positivity will be returned to you. However if you constantly want to be wrapped up in Negativity and things go wrong in your life you only have yourself to blame, this is the Universe's way of showing us if we don't learn by our own actions then we will have to take what comes to us. We all have personal responsibility. Sometimes we do have to walk away from toxic people all we can do is pray that spirit will help them see the errors of their ways. Walk away but send them love and hopefully that kind and loving thoughtform will instigate a change and help them for their own good. 

* * * * * * 

TAKING PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN DESTINY 

I am a great believer in Karma, but just what is it? Karma comes from the Sanskrit and ancient Indian Language with the underlying principal that every deed in our lives will affect our future life. For example, if we treat others badly during our lifetime we will have negative experiences later on in that lifetime or in future lifetimes. Likewise, if we treat others well we will be rewarded by positive experiences. 

In religions that believe in reincarnation, this belief is very important and forms the foundations of it. In my religion, Spiritualism, we have seven principals we aspire to, one of which is number six: 

"Compensation and retribution for all souls." 

This amounts to the same thing as Karma. It means you are responsible for all your own deeds — good and bad — and there will have to be some payback for all those deeds. Who decides this? Some may say it is God; in my beliefs it is the Universe. It has to be this way. The whole concept for us being on Earth is for us to learn and become better people, and thus closer to God, the Universe, or Spirit. We are only human. As humans, we mess up. We do it all the time and that is okay, for it is through mistakes that we reinforce the learning process. However, there will be some retribution if we have hurt others. There is no escaping this. 

Just how much retribution will depend on how much we have reflected and learned and how much we realize what we have done. Much, if not all of this negative karma, may be cancelled out should we give out care, love, compassion, and understanding to others. 

Above all, what is most important is that we realize each and every one of us is responsible for our own destiny. "For what we sow, we shall reap". Karma also transcends time, so if we think we have escaped it in this lifetime, we are mistaken. There is a constant shifting of energy in the Universe, from negative to positive and vice versa. It is not all doom and gloom. Likewise, if we have cared for, helped, and loved others, we shall be compensated and rewarded for doing so, whether in this life or the next. Always try to put yourself in the shoes of others and try to understand not everyone has had the same life experiences as you and accept this, but always do your very best. 

It is not an easy way to live, but the following Reiki principals may help you (I am a Reiki Master): 

• Just for today, do not get angry. 

• Just for today, do not worry. 

• Just for today, be grateful. 

• Just for today, work hard. 

• Just for today, be kind to others. 

You just have to do this for one day, but then tomorrow is another day, so you start over, but by taking one day at a time like this, little by little, it makes it easier to try and aspire to these ideals. 

Astrid Brown (Author)

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I SAW A WHITE FEATHER

I SAW A WHITE FEATHER

A saw a white feather drift by on a breeze

Could this be a message for me?

Was it a feather from a white dove?

The messenger harbinger of peace and love

But then the wind whipped up what was a breeze

And storm clouds on the horizon I could see

But although the sky dark and menacing

After the storm the sky a rainbow brings

So no matter what happens in life can be bad

The pattern of life always brings a time to be joyous and glad

Nothing is stagnant nor always the same

One day you’ll remember when your message of love came

If you see a white feather pick it up and treasure

It will keep hope alive as a harbinger of life’s pleasure

MAB © 

Astrid Brown (Author)

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"CAUGHT IN FRENZIED PASSION" AN EROTIC SHORT STORY

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Astrid Brown (Author)

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BOOK EXCERPT~"A PSYCHIC AFFAIR"

I hope you enjoy this excerpt from Chapter 2 of my Novel "A Psychic Affair" and it will entice you to want to read more.

Astrid xoxo

Chapter Two “The beginning”

I WISH

I wish I could remember that first word

That first chat we had

So out of the blue you came

So very unexpected, I was busy

I was so rude and you were so sweet

I wish I could remember that day

February the 13th I think

I said what, who and why

I think I made you laugh

I was so off hand but you were so sweet

I wish I could remember that moment

When I fell in love with you

It hit me like a bolt out of the blue

You made me smile and you did too

I challenged you I guess you were so sweet

I wish I could remember those moments

All of them I cherish so deep in my heart

You made me feel so warm and fuzzy

I laughed at that phrase remember

A rose for every day you said you were so sweet

Well, I do remember that first chat and the date but I wish I could remember word for word.

As the days passed, John messaged me every day always ending the conversations with his signature rose. He used to say a rose for every day and I really did say ‘you were so sweet.’ I had never met anyone as sweet as John and as the poem explains, he did impart a feeling of warmth and fuzziness on me. We used to laugh about how we could not spell; spelling just went out off the window when we chatted, we used to laugh so much about that. We sent e-greetings to one another and he had hooked and reeled me in. Two weeks into the relationship John told me he was falling for me and I knew I was falling for him. He had told me a lot about himself about how he was divorced and his ex-wife had an affair, when they had been trying for a baby. They had previously lost a child some two years ago when his wife Janet suffered a miscarriage. He was devastated when he discovered the affair. They had persevered and tried to work at their relationship for six months, but in the end, he knew he could just not forgive her and he asked her to leave.

John did not share the same beliefs as I did. I did myself try to explain my beliefs to him in the hope it might comfort him. He knew I was a medium and I told him, the baby was a little boy and he was around him often. It upset him to talk about this as he had longed for children and just could not forgive Janet for the affair especially as they had been trying for a baby. I had told him simply about his child in spirit to give him hope that there is so much more to life than on earth.

* * * * * * *

What if you believed that this life was all that there is. That there was no afterlife, no heaven and no hell. How would you view life? Would you live for the moment doing whatever you wanted? Knowing that it didn't matter who you hurt and how you treated others or would you be sad knowing this was all that there was. If this is all there is, how would you feel knowing all your hopes, dreams and aspirations die with you? Knowing that you will never again see those you love when either they or you die. Wouldn't you feel sad? Wouldn't you question the whole meaning of life? There are some people who believe in just this but the vast majority of us do believe in something, the desire to worship and believe in something is inherent within all of us. Be it a Higher Power or God, there is a tiny spark within all of us to believe what is right and wrong and to know there is something bigger than us. It's been there from the beginning of time. OK there are some people who's tiny spark may not be very bright but I firmly believe it is still there and it’s just a question of finding the right catalyst to trigger it off to burn a bit brighter.

If you believe there is a greater power and after we die we go on to live eternally how do you view your life? I feel this makes us more hopeful and it gives life more meaning and its more comforting to think our loved ones will live on. It makes our life feel more like a preparation for the next and it makes us more aware of how we should live our life and you can view life as a learning process. Supposing you are given definite proof we don't die at all and you are given evidence that your loved ones live on? Supposing you are given evidence by those who have died messages beyond the grave, only something you could possibly know or better still where a third party has to verify this evidence? Would this comfort you to know, this life is not the end and know that you will meet your loved ones again? Would this change your outlook on life, would you live it differently with new meaning?

I firmly believe when you are given this hard evidence from spirit, you do see the bigger picture, it enables you to understand why we are here on Earth and it is comforting and it takes away the fear of death. For its fear of the unknown that causes the distress. It helps us view what is important in life and makes us realize material objects are just objects and do not matter in the scheme of things. Importantly it also fans that spark of righteousness that’s within all of us to live our lives better and to treat others better. It brings us contentment.

* * * * * * *

I was trying to help John, maybe it was too soon into the relationship to tell him about all this, but I firmly believe, we are all drawn together for a common purpose to learn from and teach one another about the true meaning of why we are here. I just wanted to make him feel better and to tell him he did have a child a little boy in spirit.

Three weeks into our meeting, John started to have cold feet and told me during our chat it would be best if we ended our online relationship. He said he did not want to hurt me and it would be best if we saw other people. He told me he could not bear to feel like he had before. He told me he was falling for me and he could not bear the pain if we let this go on to be hurt again. I remember his exact words, “Like a hole in the head” I was distraught. I did not know what to say or do but cry I knew then I had fallen deeply in love with him. This was not my intention, I wasn't looking to fall in love, I wasn't even looking for a relationship, I had a trust issue too, there was just something there I could not explain nor was this infatuation, these feelings ran deep and I was drowning in them.

I phoned Annie late on a Sunday evening around three weeks after my relationship with John had begun. I was working the next day and had a series of important classes to do and I was so upset. I wondered how I would cope. Annie reassured me I would be fine, Annie’s psychic ability had come on leaps and bounds under my tutelage. She in particular liked dowsing, which taps into our ability to use our natural sensitivity our intuition, which we all possess, Annie’s favorite way of dowsing was using a Pendulum. This is a simple weight on the end of a piece of cord or light chain, a key on the end of a bit of cord to a ring or a crystal. The pendulum is the most versatile tool for use in straight question and answer type of dowsing.

“Maryann he will contact you again, I just know so,” Annie stated, “And I have used my pendulum several times to confirm this, each time it's given me a yes answer,” Annie went on. “What is it you've taught me Maryann? To always trust what we are given.”

“Yes, you are correct Annie, if you clearly feel he is coming back then I should not doubt, it's just so hard Annie,” I said.

“I know Maryann but trust me, you've taught me to trust Spirit and he is coming back, just be patient and please don't worry,” Annie reassured.

Annie as you’ve guessed was always loosing things and she swore dowsing worked extremely well for her. Now in teaching Body Therapy and Massage its necessary to check the alignment of the spine to make sure its in its correct position as it can become distorted through bad postural habits such as slouching, as this can cause back pain, etc. Well, in a teaching capacity while the students are learning to spot this we use a ‘Plumb bob’. Now a Plumb bob is a heavy, often conical weight attached to a long cord used by decorators and builders to determine a true straight line, well Annie found a new use for hers. She carried it around with her always and could be seen asking ‘Yes and No ‘ questions regularly, this was one skill she was adept at using well.

She told me, “You will still be chatting to John a year from now, trust me.” She also added, “You will get through tomorrow, I will be there to help you, all will be fine.” She had that magical gift of reassurance a fantastic quality to have in a therapist.

I returned to my Mac and I left an offline message to John telling him I had fallen in love with him. I then logged off, went to bed, and cried myself to sleep. John had really got to me, he was in my heart and entwined in my soul. I could not bear this pain. The rational part of me tried to talk sense.

“Stop being silly Maryann, you’ve only known this guy three weeks, he could be anybody”

My heart was telling me something else. As a Medium, my intuition is very strong, it needs to be so that we can pick up the sensitive vibrations from spirit and be able to pass on messages to loved ones they have left behind on earth. I could not walk away from this guy; it was totally irrational and crazy I tried to talk myself out of this so called online relationship but I was failing and it wasn't working. I had to hear from him again, there was a deep pulling towards him that I couldn't ignore.

When I arrived at college next day Annie was waiting for me and kept reassuring me. She praised me for getting through the day although I wanted so much to dissolve in tears. I was so glad to get home that evening and tried to concentrate on work and prep for my Tuesday Aromatherapy class. It was important to me that this class went well as this was a new subject and course I had developed. I had written all the course notes and had worked damn hard on this. My mind kept drifting to John I wondered what he was doing, would he message me. I switched on my Mac and logged on to messenger. Nothing, no off-lines, no emails from John. Annie was online and we chatted again she reassured me.

“Wait and see, he will get in touch,” she said confidently.

I went to bed so sad.

Next morning being Tuesday was a busy day for me. I was glad in a way as I could immerse myself into my favorite subject, well I tried to, and John crept into my mind at every opportunity. I taught psychic development that evening too and Annie kept up the reassurance all would be fine. In fact that day in Aromatherapy, we were studying a new batch of oils and I introduced Clary Sage. I warned the students it was a very potent essential oil and making sure no one had any contra indications to using it, the students used it in their blends. I couldn't help but laugh at the effect it had on Annie. I thought I might have known it would have this effect on her!

“Annie!” I exclaimed, “What are you doing?”

Annie was sitting sniffing the bottle of Clary Sage.

“Miss this is divine, I just love this!” she replied.

Now Clary Sage is not unpleasant but I personally wouldn't classify it as divine. Many Aromatherapists will tell you clients are drawn to those essential oils they need, this is because your psyche knows intuitively what essential oils will bring balance back to the body as the oils have a direct effect on the Hypothalamus. This is the area of our brains that govern our moods and emotions and this part of the brain maintains homeostasis in the body regulating our hormones.

I guess Annie must have needed this essential oil big style. Now if you have ever seen a cat with a toy mouse stuffed with catnip, well Annie was giving a good impression of this!

“Annie, I think you have had more than enough of Clary Sage,” I told her removing and wrestling the bottle from her grasp, trying my best not to laugh.

Annie was totally high and after the effects of this wore off, she had to lie on one of the massage couches to sleep it off the rest of the afternoon, much to the amusement of her classmates as she quietly snored in the corner.

Now Clary Sage does induce a state of euphoria, which is why you must not drink after using this oil as it potentiates the effects. Annie however did not drink, it just had this extreme effect on her and I had to make sure the Clary Sage was kept under lock and key when she was in the vicinity.

On my way to the Development class that evening I planned what I would do with the students, they were an eager bunch to learn more and I thought I would push Annie straight into the deep end, I would encourage her to link directly with Spirit and give her first direct message. It was not unusual for me to pick up spirit for when you think about it the Psychic college was like Piccadilly Circus, there was always someone’s loved one or a guide around, but the spirit I was picking up was that of a young child. I could clearly see him in my mind’s eye, he had fairish curls and big brown eyes, and he was the spirit of a two year old boy. This little spirit seemed sad and upset and was clinging to me. I tried my best to communicate with this little boy, he was obviously trying to tell me something but I couldn’t work it out.

Annie arrived as I was preparing the room for the night’s class.

“Hello Annie, glad you could make it, you’re early,” I greeted Annie with a smile.

“Oh no way would I miss this, I enjoyed last week so much Miss,” Annie answered. “Miss there is a sad energy in here tonight, I think it’s a little boy.”

“I believe it is Annie but I can’t make out what he’s trying to tell me,” I said.

“Awww Miss I think he is connected to John,” Annie said.

“Oh my God Annie!” I explained, “He’s the little boy, the miscarriage Annie.”

“He’s sad because John is sad,” Annie said softly, “And that’s why he is here, to tell you his father John is sad.”

That made me feel sad too, even sadder than I was already and now I knew John was sad.

“What can I do Annie? I miss John but he won’t message me or email.”

I could feel the little spirit child hug me and I sent him love and promised him I would try my best to try to make his daddy happy again.

“Don’t worry Miss, John will contact you,” Annie stated confidently.

“OK Class tonight we are going to do some Platform work,” I announced.

Platform work is where the Medium stands on the Platform, which is a small stage and relays messages from spirit to give evidence of survival i.e. passed information to the audience from spirit that is only something they would know, thus proving spirit and the afterlife exists.

My students had given some messages before and they knew I would help them through it and they also knew something else.

“And you know you can’t cheat either,” I stated. “I tune into Spirit when you do,” I also added smiling.

They collectively answered, smiling, “We know you do and that we can’t fool you!”

* * * * * * *

I was already tuning in and was well aware of the spirit of my grandmother. My grandmother was one of my main guides. Just as we need Mediums on the earth side, we also need spirits in the spirit realms who can go between just like Mediums do on earth. My grandmother was perfect for this role as she had been a platform Medium herself in the Spiritualist Church. She would tell me as a young girl about many of her experiences and one I remember very well, about the day one of my older cousins was born. 

One of my aunts and her husband stayed with my grandmother and my aunt was expecting her first child. It had been a difficult labor and it was obvious when the baby girl was born something was seriously wrong with the baby. She was floppy and unresponsive and the doctor attending the home birth had told my grandmother he did not expect the baby to survive the night. My grandmother took the baby into her room and placed her in a crib and made her comfortable and everyone expected the baby would not survive. My grandmother woke during the early hours of the morning and looked over at the baby in her crib, she was astounded to see the tiny baby surrounded by angels from tiny cherubs to larger angels all looking down upon my tiny cousin. My grandmother was transfixed by this scene and watched for some time and fell into a deep sleep. She was woken a few hours later by a baby crying lustily and obviously a very hungry tiny baby at that. My grandmother overjoyed took the baby through to her mother crying with joy and called the doctor. The baby was found to be perfectly normal and alert, a completely different little soul as to how she had been the day before.

That story still gives me goosebumps every time I recall it and one of many spiritual experiences and stories from my grandmother and my early years.

My grandmother sadly passed over when I was ten years old and when she did I felt part of my soul went too. The night she passed was so traumatic; I always went to her room each evening to kiss her good night. For the first time ever she shooed me away, she shouted at me,

“Go away, I don’t want to see you tonight!”

I was upset, hurt I went to bed, something was not right, I loved my grandmother and I knew she loved me. Not once had she raised her voice to me, she was the only one who really had the time for me. Looking back I guess we had a lot in common and throughout my childhood my mother would often say,

“You are so like my mother!”

Especially if I was not doing what she expected of me.

I was awoken by my father. “Your Gran has died lass,” he stated.

I looked at him in disbelief “When Daddy?” I asked.

“About an hour or so ago, we reckon,” he answered. “Your Mum went in to say good night and found her, she had been sick, the doctor is here just now, stay in your room just now lass,” he added.

I could hear muffled voices through the wall, my Mum was sobbing and I could hear the voice of my Grandmother’s doctor he was talking quietly to my Dad. I heard my Dad explain to my Mum that my Grandmother had had a heart attack. Although she was 84, my Grandmother was so spritely I thought she would live forever. Later on I was to discover she indeed did. I understood too why she had shooed me away that evening too, she knew her death was imminent and wanted to spare me witnessing it.

It was such a surreal night, I had the most awful bereft feeling in the pit of my stomach, I felt churned up and sick, I felt so ill, I thought I was going to die too. I can still remember the smells of the undertaker and the embalming fluid as he worked on my grandmother; she was dressed in a shroud and laid out on her bed. A steady stream of aunts, my mother’s sisters, came and went, as did friends of my grandmother. Upset was replaced by fear. I was overcome by strange feelings I could not explain, much more powerful than I had experienced when I was younger.

I had felt so different as a child I played with children no one else could see, I couldn’t always see them, but I knew they were there. They played along with me and it was fun. I recall my Mum used to shake her head, as I would talk about them. I felt deep inside what she was thinking that I was not like my brother, nor did I appear to be like other children. I didn’t know at the time these were Spirit Children, that hadn’t been explained to me. I was constantly told by my Mum it was my imagination and I seemed to have more of an imagination than others, it was constantly dismissed and not to be talked about.

I didn’t like these feelings, I had these constant sensations like tingling and buzzing in my ears like someone was watching me that whoever it was, was standing behind me. It was a cold feeling I couldn’t understand it and it made me feel afraid.

My grandmother passed over on the 10th December 1967 and it was to be a very sad Christmas. I was heartbroken and missing my grandmother so much, I had no one to tell how I felt, who could I tell? I felt a strong presence, watching me. That presence was my beloved grandmother.        

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ISBN-10: 1494935740

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